It is very common for people in our culture to cover up their personal struggles by putting a happy, lovable face on for the world. People do not tend to bare their hardships to others because our society considers it a sign of weakness. This is a tragedy considering that sharing our struggles with others is integral to recovering from them. All too often, rather than working on their problems, people will cover them up with a winning disposition. An outer personality that is covering up a troubled inner life may seem like an easy fix, but the unhealthiness going on below the surface can be purely devastating.
Everyone likes a charming personality. This may come in the form of flirting, having great social skills, being funny or amusing or being memorable in some other positive way. This outer layer of the personality is often what sells a person, but it is also frequently not the most genuine side of a person. People are often aware of how they come across and how important first impressions are, so they will go out of their way to develop an attractive social persona in order to win people over. However, if they are neglecting a mental health problem, past trauma, emotional issue or disorder, this can be destructive to good mental health. Even those who think they are on top of the world because they win people over initially will discover that the truth of who they are comes out the closer they get to another person.
People may use an attractive social personality to cover up anger issues, depression, anxiety or a range of other less popular ways of being than charming. Recovering from these conditions is possible but in order to do so, the outer false layer must be peeled back in order to access the vulnerable parts of the person. A person who is deliberately avoiding this is only hurting themselves.